New Mercies

After an incredibly difficult weekend with more crying than I expected, I'm feeling most refreshed. 
As there was not much sleeping to be done over the weekend, today after class I allowed myself to crawl back into my bed and recover a little bit. 3 1/2 incredible hours later, I woke up to find it was delightfully warm outside and the sun was shining and a walk with a dear friend to look forward to. 


I just love Jesus. I love how he is quick to bring healing and quick to send joy and quick to forgive. I love how he comforts and sends encouragement at all the perfect times. 

Are You Happy?

“All men seek happiness, This is without exception. Whatever different means they employ, they all tend to this end. The cause of some going to war, and of others avoiding it, is the same desire in both, attended with different views. The will never takes the least step but to this object. This is the motive of every action of every man, even of those who hang themselves.”  – Blaise Pascal


I was introduced to the above quote tonight at the college ministry I attend. It's quite deep and I'm still attempting to process it.  It's true. I myself am constantly seeking joy. I want to always be joyful, to be filled and overflowing with joy.... or am I?


I remember someone saying that the difference between joy and happiness was that happiness was circumstantial while joy was something we always have access to through Jesus, no matter what is going on in our lives. So then the question is, what is motivating my actions? And do my actions reflect my seeking joy or my seeking happiness?

    Psalm 16:11

   You make known to me the path of life;
   you will fill me with joy in your presence,
   with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

All men seek happiness and it's really only truly found in God. This quote about happiness being the primary motivation is kind of a huuuge wake up call. If I'm being honest, a lot of the time, I don't seek God for my happiness. If happiness is the motivation behind my every action, I find my happiness in all the wrong places. 
I had to think.. what exactly do I do with my free time?
-facebook
-texting
-Dinner with friends
-Sleep
-homework
-Listen to music
-Cook
-Spend time with people
-Chat with my roommate. 
-Check email
-Go to my sister's house.. 

And if I have time... (What!?)


-Read my bible
-Journal and pray 


All of these things bring happiness in some form, right? I mean.. otherwise I wouldn't do them. I find how I spend most of my free time to be disturbing.  
 I think I would like to take this idea of being happy a little further and ask, "Are you satisfied?" 
Because, if you think about it, if we are not satisfied, are we really truly happy?
It's difficult to be happy when there is longing for something more or if there is some un-fulfillment in our lives lingering in the background or looming over head. In the past week and a half, I have found myself to be unsatisfied. 
Facebook is boring to me, I don't have any new emails, Homework is not that exciting, texting is sporadic etc. I've been longing for something more. 


God created us so beautifully with a longing to be with Him. He is the only one or thing who will make us happy, the only thing that will satisfy. 
In my quest to find out what about God is so satisfying about Jesus, I found this quote by Charles Spurgeon that I think says it all. 

"When Jesus is the host, no guest goes empty from the table. Our head is satisfied with the precious truth which Christ reveals; our heart is content with Jesus, as the altogether lovely object of affection; our hope is satisfied, for whom have we in heaven but Jesus? and our desire is satiated, for what can we wish for more than to know Christ and to be found in him. Jesus fills our conscience till it is at perfect peace; our judgment with persuasion of the certainty of his teachings; our memory with recollections of what he has done, and our imagination with the prospects of what he is yet to do." -Charles Spurgeon 

“For He has satisfied the thirsty soul, and the hungry soul He has filled with what is good.” (Ps. 107:9)

A little bit of Life

I've reached a little bit of a writer's block in that I haven't had any inspiring thoughts or deep ponderments of late.. but I don't want this blog to get boring either. :)


So my life.. Classes started a week ago tuesday and they are going quite well. There's only one or two that I foresee as difficult, and I say difficult because it will be difficult for me to stay awake and/or focused in them as the teacher's monotone voice drones on while the powerpoint slide stays the same for 20 minutes. I'm rather terrible at focusing during lectures sometimes. I haven't had to sit in a lecture hall with 100 other students since freshman year and so it's a bit of a challenge to get used to that again. 
I've rather trained myself to fall asleep to monotone voices. At home, when my siblings and I want to take an afternoon nap, we watch Planet Earth documentaries and fall fast asleep. (Last time I was home we watched a documentary on China... I was out 15 minutes in. ) So.. lectures will be a fun challenge.


Oh! And another thing about me is that I'm attempting to fix some health problems by avoiding gluten, starch, sugar, and lactose for a few months. When I was 15 yrs. old I had a bad case of food poisoning that landed me in the ER with IVs and blood tests and other such nasty needle business. Since then I've had various stomach issues with mild lactose intolerance, stomach ulcers, upset stomach.. etc. Apparently that's not normal and (hopefully) can be fixed. Woohoo! It's been a little bit of an adventure finding things that are okay to eat while my intestines repair themselves. 

Apples and Peanut butter = BEST. SNACK. EVER!

One of my most favorite discoveries has been all-natural peanut butter. :) I have never much been a fan of peanut butter. I ate it on occasion and didn't mind it with chocolate, but, it had a very sticky texture that I didn't much care for. Then! My mom brought me home this piece of heaven that doesn't have any sugar or honey or anything added to it. Since discovering it 16 days ago, I have managed to consume 4 jars of it. I eat it with apples. I LOVE apples. My most favorite snack I'd say. I've eaten so many apples the last couple weeks, I don't think the doctor could get close to me if he tried. Teehee. 

Random January thoughts

Since everyone posts all their accomplishments and proud moments (and sometimes not proud moments) on Facebook for everyone to see and "like" and comment on...  I decided not to put this on Facebook. But! I am very proud of this. While I was home on break, Young Mr. Kolby needed a hair cut. Usually Pearl does all the boys' hair around our house but as it was, Kolby didn't want Pearl to cut his hair when she was home and it was rather long and quite curly. 

I've cut my other brothers' hair before and their hair is not curly and so I found that there is a little more challenge in cutting curly hair because it does not cooperate very well. Even MORE skill is required in cutting hair for a 7 year old boy because HE does not cooperate either.. well.. he was pretty good.. just squirmy and impatient. 

Along with the fact that I attempted to give some hair cuts over the summer and they weren't as awesome as Pearl's haircuts. But, to my very pleasant surprise, Kolby trusted me to cut his hair. :) YAY! So, after I took about 3 or 4 inches off of his head.. he was free to go :) I think he said he liked his haircut too. 

Before                                                                                                                    After          

My Winter Break

One of my projects whilst being home was to take care of ceiling that has been pelted by steam from the shower for a very long time. Poor thing. 

"I have the strangest feeling you shouldn't touch that"

Scraped and spackled.

 I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor, don't call me the Rotmeister.

Christmas at the Kohl house!!! Well.. it wasn't actually Christmas.. we didn't celebrate Christmas til Dec. 28th... but it was delightful!! All 10 of the siblings were able to be home and exchange gifts and watch Psych and play games together and just spend good time in each other's company.

Ken, Pearl, Kurt

Grace and Kit

Pearl and Kurt

Eva and Ken

:) I love my siblings!

Mom made us these sweet aprons for Christmas. :)

So, one of the things we did with all ten of us being home was played hide-and-go-seek in the dark after mom and dad had gone to sleep. One of my siblings had the idea to break glow-sticks open into a jar... and apparently flick glow-stick juice all over the kitchen floor. There were several of us sporting the glowing magic on our skin and clothing until my oldest sister who works as a Chemist intervened and stated the danger of the chemicals on our skin and made us all wash it off and clean it up. 

Rave party anyone?

As  January has brought many a day above 50 degrees, Kolby and Kyle coaxed me outside to play football with their rules. Each touch down was worth 1 point. (They wanted to play first one to 50) and what ever Kyle said was a rule counted. ....I lost.  

Football cheater.

Kolby and Kyle celebrated their victory after winning the football game via tackling me for every play and/or changing what side of the yard they had to run to to get a touch down. 

Pin the Tail on the New Years

The end has come for the year 2011 and as the new year approaches I thought it would be a good time to reflect on how I have grown in Jesus this year. Which got me thinking... it seems that New Years is advertised as a big deal because it's your time to think and reflect and start over. Of course that is what a lot of people do when the new year comes.. I mean.. people *try* to do that. They try to make the new year sound like some deep meaningful mile marker that is so great an achievement that we should all pat each other on the back and give free high fives.  It sounds silly.. but it's true. Why is it that people try to make New Years into something so big?  


I've found that people see New Years as that chance to start over, turn a new page, if you will. It's a nice concept. I feel like New Years might mean a lot more to non-believers because their chances to "start brand new" only happens once a year...ish. Thank goodness God's mercies are new every morning. No one has to wait for the New Year seeing as God is available 24/7, but since a lot of people don't see any need to believe in God or ask God for help or include God in their lives... New Years is as good a time as any to attempt to create some order to one's life.


 I'm sure a lot of people can relate to the feeling of going through life blind folded. (Christians call it walking by faith.) Sometimes life is a bit like the game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey.. you're blind folded. Everyone is trying to tack a tail onto the thing and of course they look foolish as they blindly stick it where ever they think it goes and often finding themselves missing the mark by a long shot. Of course there are the kids who wait for their turn and watch where the other kids put their failed tails and attempt to grope out the right spot with their fingers while wearing their blindfolds... a noble effort.. but still off. 
People blindly try to pin the meaning of things all over their life. Death... why do people die? What comes after you die? What is one's life purpose? Life.. What did I do with my entire last year? What should I do this coming year? What's the point of New Year's resolutions if I know I'm not gonna follow through? We try to tack on the answers and meanings where we think they go. We try to follow the examples of others and feel out the answer from what others have tried.
But, Jesus is like that kind adult that would take the blind folded person's hand and guide it to the right spot on the donkey. It doesn't always feel right because there are no other tails around it cuz everyone else has missed the mark by a long shot and it feels like you're just tacking the tail on in the middle of nowhere. But Jesus know what he's doing, he's got answers. Alls we have to do is trust him. 

Christmas Cheer is In the Air!

My Calvin nd Hobbes cookie... I was told he looked like Charlie Brown..

Decorating cookies is fun! :)

Add caption

Our connection group had a cookie decorating party to wrap up a wonderful semester of growing together and uncovering Truth by reading the Word. :)

I turned the Christmas stocking cookie upside down and it looked like a llama...
So I decorated it accordingly. 

It was quite the spread we had going on..