Brazil- A Mountain-top Experience

Psalm 121:1-3

  I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
   where does my help come from? 

 My help comes from the LORD,
   the Maker of heaven and earth.

 He will not let your foot slip—
   he who watches over you will not slumber

Wednesday. The middle day of the week that is considered the peak of the mountain or the top of the hill because the rest of the week is all down hill. Ironically enough, Wednesday was the day that we climbed a mountain. 

I actually didn't know that we were going to be climbing a mountain. Perhaps this was because of my disconnected feeling to things that I did not catch it. Paige had told us a few times that we would be going on a hike and I don't think I cared much beyond that. (Hmm.. apathy.. 

tis a dangerous thing to have on a missions trip..) Anyways.. Hike day came and I was much looking forward to the adventure of it all. We met up with some of the older boys of the Lar that lived at a location in the town and we took a bus to the starting point of our great hike.

 

You can't really see the top here because it's in the clouds.

When I saw the mountain I realized why Paige had stressed the need for there to be 2 bottles of water for every person.  It was kind of a beast. Apart from the fact that I do not regularly climb mountains and do not think myself to be made for climbing mountains.. I am quite a bit of an asthmatic as well. Even just sleeping in the hammocks at the Lar was enough to tighten my lungs so that yawning in the morning was impossible with out a lot of pain. Thankfully I had thought ahead enough to bring my inhaler and other medications to Brazil with me. I have not had need for my inhaler during the day time for a long long time.. sometimes in the morning to open my lungs up again. but I generally don't carry it.  On this day, for some odd reason I put my inhaler in my backpack last minute. 1/4 the way up the mountain I realized I was fairly dependent on that little tiny pressurized canister. I hated it. While a lot of people were having the time of their life climbing that mountain, navigating the steep rocks and wet clay.. I was not. 


It was more humiliating than anything else. I hated that my lungs were shutting off and I just couldn't stay at the front of the group like I was supposed to. Thankfully.. I wasn't the only one who had to take it a little slower than the rest of the group. But even going at it a slower pace with a few others.. I kept on thinking "why God? Why did you give me these lungs? Why can't I just keep up with everyone else?" 
I felt like everyone else made climbing mountains look like the easiest most natural thing in the world to them. I hated that to. I just wanted to get to the top of the mountain so that I could be done with it. It was rather difficult to enjoy the lush green plants and beautiful flowers growing on the side of the mountain.  

The half way point.

Climbing

God did some beautiful things on this mountain.

I did not really enjoy the climbing of the mountain. I enjoyed the resting parts of it. And the more we climbed, the more I enjoyed not climbing. 
While climbing, sometimes my foot would slip, or I would stumble. Sometimes it was difficult to find a foothold in the wet clay from the earlier rain. I kept thinking of the Psalms where David would talk about almost slipping or needing a strong foothold.  I've heard a lot of mountain analogies in church and Bible studies and other such places but.. I live in Iowa. The flattest part of Iowa. I grew up where you can stand on a roof and see 3 or 4 towns in a 20 mile radius. Flat flat flat. I was finally understanding what David was meaning when he said that he needed God to keep his feet from slipping. I was finally understanding the significance of the mountains we face in our own lives. Mountains are not easy to climb. Mountains can be dangerous.. if you fall when you're climbing a mountain.. may God have mercy you.. and pity the man who falls and has no one to pick him up. 


Anyways.. those 2 bottles of water were like drops of heaven while making the climb. In fact.. I think I ended up drinking closer to 8 or 9 bottles while going up the thing. I have never in my life consumed so much water in one morning.... but it seemed to help the dizziness.  Annnnyways.. after a little more than 2 hours of climb climb climbing the mountain and being tired and sweaty and gross we reached the almost top. It wasn't THEE top.. but it was up there. And there at the top was a beautiful lake and a place of rest.  

The Lake at the top where we swam and rested and ate lunch.

We had a devotional time at the top. 

After that time of rest and renewal of energy, we went continued up to the very top of the mountain to the highest point in the state where we could see the city and the ocean and.. just everything. 

sitting on a rock at the top of the mountain. 

The team at the top. 

And it was all down hill from there.  It was great being at the top. Breath taking and amazing... and it was even more exciting because it takes a lot less energy getting down a mountain then up one. But! It's easy to slip when coming down the mountain. Coming down we had to be careful to pick our path so that we did not roll an ankle or fall head long onto the rocks.  

To be honest.. i was glad when the mountain was over and I was glad when wednesday was over. I was on day closer to going home and I had gotten past the most strenuous part of the trip. Looking back now, though, I can see a lot of Biblical analogies. Everything about the mountain can be taken as a lesson in everyday life.  

Brazil- Washed in White

Psalm 51:7
Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
   wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.


Tuesday in Brazil was much like Monday. I spent most of the day white washing the wall and being completely covered in white wash paint by the end of the day. It meant a lot when the wall finally had it's first coat of white wash because it looked like we had gotten something accomplished! It's amazing how different something can look after being coated in white. I thought about how Jesus does the same things with us. We are dirty and broken down and in need of some help and he scrapes us down and prepares us for some white washing. Once done.. we look different inside and out! And after the wall had a layer of white wash on it.. it looked a lot better than it did before. After the Visas miracle and the feeling of being disconnected, I just was looking for the reason God had brought us on the trip. I was thinking "Obviously.. He wouldn't pulled off that miracle for us if there wasn't a specific reason." And seeing our work at the wall well done I thought, "Hmm.. perhaps THIS is it. Perhaps this is the reason we were sent. To help fix a wall.."

L to R: Mandy (worked at the Lar), myself, and teammate Victoria
We worked on this wall til it got dark out.
We were much excited when we finished!

After an entire day of working and painting, I looked down at my feet
and thought about the verse that says "How beautiful are the feet
that bring good news." My feet did not look beautiful to me..

After Completing the wall and being exhausted and excited to go to sleep, we were informed that there was a Bible study in the older girls house (12-14yrs old) and we were to participate. At first I didn't want to go because I was tired, filthy, and the Bible study was supposed to be starting right about the time we finished the wall.  After a super speedy shower and wash off time, Victoria and I hurried over to the girl's house to join them for Bible study. One of the American girls who lives at the Lar gave the Bible study while Rachel, the daughter of  Paige and Mark, translated. 

The Bible study was about guilt and experiencing God's forgiveness. After reading some Bible verses and such, the girl leading the Bible study opened it up for sharing things such as your testimony. Mandy was the first to speak and she said that she had quit her job, sold her house and her car and basically everything she had to move to Brazil and with that she had left her past behind and she looked forward to the future. One of the girls from my team shared about how she had come to know Jesus and why He had meant so much to her. Then.. it got a little crazy. 

One of the girls from the Lar said she wanted to share her story. She was 13 years old and she talked about how she had become addicted to crack at age 3 and by the time she was 10 she was both a crack addict and a prostitute trying to get money for drugs. She talked about how she had been rescued and brought to the Lar where she realized that there were people that actually cared about her and she gave her life to Jesus. 

I told her how I amazed I was and I asked her how she was so brave in telling others about it boldly and not worrying of what others might think. Her response was,  "I like my story. I did not like what I went through, but I like how Jesus changed me and how I can use that now. When I grow up, I hope to use my story to reach out to other girls on the streets who are going through the same thing." 

..Wow. I get chills even thinking back on it now. She had such a beautiful smile when telling her story and she was absolutely serious about liking her story. The story sharing didn't stop with her though. Several other girls whose ages ranged from 12-14 began opening up and sharing about how they had been raped and abused and mistreated over and over again by many different people and all this horrific stuff but they trusted Jesus. They knew Jesus could make them whole and bring healing. How mind blowing that was to me. First of all, these girls were at the stage in life where self-esteem means everything and they been robbed of self-worth by people in the family and people they knew. Second of all.. these girls had already been through hell and were able to praise Jesus for it.  

While we were finishing up the discussion that night, Rachel asked the girls, "You know we love you, right?" One of the girls who had shared with us responded, "Yes, of course we know you love us. We see your love because you go to a school away from your families and when you get a break and a chance to see your families, you came to us instead. You gave up seeing your families to come to a different country and spend time with us and you didn't even know us. That is how we know you love us." And I think that is when God thumped me on the head and said "This is why you came. This is why you got your visas." 

Afterwards, we were told that nothing like that had ever happened. The girls had not opened up like that to anybody else. Again I was humbled, we had only been there 2 full days and we did not speak their language.. but God was working using us. Even though it seemed like my story was NOTHING compared to their story.. God showed me how He works in everyone's stories. There is no scale by which one can judge how great someone's God-story is. A God-story is an epic story period. How beautiful is the work God does when He changes someone's heart. How beautiful is the story of someone who has come to trust Jesus. 

Us with the girls after the Bible study

Brazil- A Lesson in Perseverance.

3/14/11 Monday

" What a day. Getting past the bugs and frogs and bats, it's nice here. Warm and sunny. The hard part is that I don't feel like I belong much with my team.= I feel strangely disconnected from things even though it is only the second day here. If I'm being honest.. I think I feel sad here. I am in Brazil! I am in Fortaleza Brazil and I'm not in love. I'm homesick. Home sick for my church. I'm homesick for the kind of Missions trip I was raised to do. One focused all on Jesus and getting things done. I'm homesick for organization. I can handle bugs and frogs and giant spiders and tarantulas.. But I can't take isolation or loneliness. " 


Monday was our first full day in Brazil. After breakfast, our team was split up and assigned to different jobs around the Lar. Myself and one of the guys were assigned to trim back the mango trees and such that were hanging over the houses and could fall and cause the tiles to break. Up until that point, I had never before experienced getting bitten by fire ants, but there were a lot in the branches we cleared. Annoying.. but part of the experience. After lunch I found myself with the the girls and one of my guy teammates outside the Lar at the front wall scraping it down in preparation for a fresh coat of whitewash. Manual labor has never bothered me. In fact, I enjoy a lot. It's quite soothing and it gave me a sense of purpose. There is satisfaction in a job well done. I enjoyed working next to the kids as they helped us scraped down the wall as well. It was great. 

The Entire wall had to be scraped down by hand 

The kids were a great help in working on this wall

The length of the wall that had to be hand scraped. 

Looking back on the trip.. the disconnection came from just being on a missions trip that was shaped entirely different from how I have always done missions trips. The missions trips I've been on, the work gets done first, everyone works together, everyone encourages each other and works together to make the work fun. After the work gets done, build relationships with the people there. It's always been so well balanced and structured. For this trip, it was more casual. Get the work done if you feel like it.. work on it if you feel like it.. build relationships with the kids if you feel like it.. help your teammates do the work if you feel like it. 
It was different. Not wrong.. just different. It was really good for me because I had to motivate myself to do work and to work with my teammates in the midst of feeling disconnected. I think my biggest take away from that was that there will for sure be times in the future where I will be on a team where there may not be a great sense of unity and there may not be a great deal of motivation to accomplish the things that need to get done and I am called to react to those situations in a godly manner. 


While working at the wall I can very vividly remember the verse where Paul says to "press on towards the goal" popping into my mind. I thought about what it means to press on. It doesn't mean that you keep on going the same pace and having the same cheerful attitude. It means that there will be tough situations where it requires more than your usual pace. It requires you pushing into it.. pressing into it. Press on.. push through it, struggle through it, work your way through it. And not by yourself either.. with Christ you press on. Christ is the only one strong enough to really conquer the difficult moments. 
It's not like scraping down a wall was difficult or playing with the kids was difficult.. but feeling almost distant from God was difficult. I found myself wondering.. why did God call me here if His spirit is not with me? It was so I would learn. Learn to be like Christ in all situations. God was very much with me and testing my willingness to follow Him to places outside of my comfort zone. As I have had time to process through things.. the big question that still burns on my mind is.. did I pass the test?


I don't think it's a pass or fail test though. God does not fail us when we are tested in that way. I have found, though, that I feel like I fail myself. I don't feel like I should have been stretched the way I was. By that I mean, I feel like I failed because it was more difficult for me than you'd think it should have been.  I keep asking myself.. in all my faith and trusting in Jesus and my heart for orphans and doing the work of Jesus.. what did I do wrong, or what did I fail to do that I wasn't prepared for what I felt in Brazil? I felt that if I was really trusting Jesus than I would just be filled with joy through the whole thing. I didn't have joy and so I felt guilty that perhaps I wasn't trusting Jesus or that I was doing something wrong. 
It has been a week and a half since I returned from Brazil and I am still contemplating and processing why it was so stretching for me. What I feel most strongly is that it is not a bad thing that I was stretched. Obviously.. stretching by the Holy Spirit is a very good thing. I am humbled by it all but I look forward to what fruit may come from the seeds planting in me through the stretching. 

James 1:2-4 

  Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,  because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Brazil - Just a Bit of a Stretch

**Brazil cannot be summed up in one single post and so I think I shall share about it day by day and say what I felt God was teaching me through it. **


3/11/11 Sunday


"Well, coming to the end of our very first day in Brazil. We arrived here in Fortaleza tired and a little bit jet legged. We were greeted in the airport by Paige Anderson, the missionary that runs this orphanage. The first thing I remember her saying was 'Are you guys tired? Well get over it right now.' And that's just how Paige is. She's very energetic and cheery. After the airport we were whisked away for a brief lunch and then Paige took us to the orphanage. This proves to be far more of a stretch for me than I thought. I don't know what I pictured about Brazil.. epic vacation maybe?.. but this is crazy. Our house has also introduced us to our roommates of large cockroaches, frogs, geckos, and wasps. :| Today during church, a bat flew in and landed on a fan above some girls. While the girls squirmed some, everything went on as normal.
 The children here were rescued from prostitution, crime and other unfortunate circumstances. I wonder at what God will teach me in these coming days."


The above is an entry from my prayer journal. A brief look into my first 8 hours in Fortaleza. I could tell from the beginning that the trip was going to stretch me in ways that I had not expected. To be honest.. I tried to think back on what I had expected and I couldn't come up with anything really clear. I had not expected much of anything. I just hadn't expected bugs and poisonous critters or any sort of danger at all. I have been on many missions trips with my church back home and I don't think there was ever a time that I felt unsafe. Even when staying in a church right in the middle of inner-city KC where people had been murdered a couple blocks over.. I felt safe. When sharing my faith with drug addicts and ex convicts on the streets of Omaha, I felt safe.  I Like to feel safe. But, our first evening in Brazil we were warned of Dangy Fever and other diseases carried by bugs of which we needed to take caution. That was a bit of a trusting adventure because I had no bug spray and I was for sure getting eaten alive. 
Truly there was no reason to really fear getting sick or bitten by something poisonous.. but I didn't really care for the idea either. That Sunday also started our dependence on bottled water for the week as well. We used it for drinking, brushing our teeth, flushing our eyes and occasionally cleaning dirt out of a wound if one so desired. It was right from the get-go that I realized that I was in for an adventure and that God had some major work to do on my heart. 


You know, you always hear about fortunate Americans going on a mission trip to some impoverished place and commenting "They didn't have much, but they were happy." Well, in my own little heart of hearts I've always thought.. of course. I would just expect that because God gives joy in all circumstances and thats not really a lesson I would need to learn myself. 
That first night at church the kids were just all over the place excited about anything and were so into the worship songs and you could just see joy in them. Being exhausted from all the travels I mostly found myself staring in wonder at how much they enjoyed being in church. Even more so, I wondered at how I was not over come with joy myself. Joy is something that tends to be contagious and overwhelming. I thought to myself, "Perhaps it is just because I am tired that I feel kind of out of place." 
And don't get me wrong.. I enjoyed those kids very much. I loved how they didn't know me but would climb into my lap and play with my hair and hug me and want me to sit by them after the short few minutes of knowing of my existence. It was awesome! But, for some strange reason I felt disconnected to it all. A lot like I was watching and not really apart of what I was seeing. 

Just another spider.. 

One of my roommates. 

My teammate, Victoria, and I shared this room.

This is the house our team stayed in while we were there.
For the children, there are about 15 kids in a house with one house mom.

What you see when you walk into the house.
The kitchen and living room area. Our house was not furnished.

The door front door. As you can see, the windows in our house
are just some clay star things that let in a breeze from outside.
The windows also served as the perfect places for wasps to build their nests.

The Miracle Behind the Visas

1 Samuel 14

  One day Jonathan son of Saul said to his young armor-bearer, “Come, let’s go over to the Philistine outpost on the other side.” But he did not tell his father.  Saul was staying on the outskirts of Gibeah under a pomegranate tree in Migron. With him were about six hundred men,  among whom was Ahijah, who was wearing an ephod. He was a son of Ichabod’s brother Ahitub son of Phinehas, the son of Eli, the LORD’s priest in Shiloh. No one was aware that Jonathan had left.
  On each side of the pass that Jonathan intended to cross to reach the Philistine outpost was a cliff; one was called Bozez and the other Seneh. One cliff stood to the north toward Mikmash, the other to the south toward Geba.
  Jonathan said to his young armor-bearer, “Come, let’s go over to the outpost of those uncircumcised men. Perhaps the LORD will act in our behalf. Nothing can hinder the LORD from saving, whether by many or by few.”
 “Do all that you have in mind,” his armor-bearer said. “Go ahead; I am with you heart and soul.”
 Jonathan said, “Come on, then; we will cross over toward them and let them see us If they say to us, ‘Wait there until we come to you,’ we will stay where we are and not go up to them.  But if they say, ‘Come up to us,’ we will climb up, because that will be our sign that the LORD has given them into our hands.”
  So both of them showed themselves to the Philistine outpost. “Look!” said the Philistines. “The Hebrews are crawling out of the holes they were hiding in.” ¹² The men of the outpost shouted to Jonathan and his armor-bearer, “Come up to us and we’ll teach you a lesson.”
   So Jonathan said to his armor-bearer, “Climb up after me; the LORD has given them into the hand of Israel.”
  Jonathan climbed up, using his hands and feet, with his armor-bearer right behind him. The Philistines fell before Jonathan, and his armor-bearer followed and killed behind him.  

My last blog explained the story of the Visas from my point of view. After hearing the inside story from Jeff.. I am much excited to share it with everyone else! So here it goes.


**This is my own memory of the story and so not all the details will be included nor will it all be word for word**


We'll start with a quick review of the story. On Tuesday before we were to leave we received back all 7 passports saying the Visas were denied. Wednesday Jeff drove to Chicago and did everything he could but was told it was impossible. It would take 3 business days and he could have the visas by Monday.  Our flights were for saturday but Jeff went with that option anyways. Thursday he couldn't get flights changed so it was Saturday or May.  
Friday morning Clint Robinson (one of the other staff guys from Veritas) had been watching the visas status online and there were four boxes that needed to be checked off and the last box says "ready for pick up." Clint called Jeff and says "I've been watching these boxes and the first three are checked and I've been praying and I'd like to think that i have faith in God that he can do this and I'm thinking about just jumping in the car and driving to Chicago again."
Jeff's response was "Great. Pick me up." 
Clint "Ok. I'm two minutes away from your house." 


So they started the 4 hour drive to Chicago at 9:30 in the morning. At the consulate there is a policy that Visas can only be picked up between 11am and 1pm.  Jeff was dropped off at the consulate at 1:10pm and quickly went up to the 18th floor to see that the windows are dark and there's a curtain drawn over the visa place. He tried the door and found it to be unlocked and so he went in and came from behind the curtain where he saw two women speaking Portuguese. When they saw him one of the women began to yell at him saying "what are you doing here?? You can't be here? We're closed.. visas pickups ended at 1pm..etc etc"
 Jeff apologizes and kind of explains the situation and the lady told him "well, come back at 2:30 and i'm not even guaranteeing that someone will talk to you, but just come back at 2:30."
So Jeff leaves and kills some time and at 2:30 Clint and him return to the consulate. This time, the windows are dark, the curtains are drawn, and the door is locked. But they noticed an intercom on the wall next to them and they pushed the button. Then two men came walking down the hallway and asks "have you been helped yet?" and Jeff says "no" right when the intercom comes on and says "how may I help you?" and so the guy who had come down the hall answers the intercom and says "never mind" and then goes into a side door and disappears. Jeff and Clint were left to stand in the hall way for a little bit. 
After 10 or 15 minutes go by the hit the intercom again and a man's voice comes on and says "what do you want?" 
Clint replies "Hi, my names Jeff Thune. I'm here about visas and someone told us to come back at 2:30"
The man came out to the hallway and asked them "who told you to come back?"
Jeff described her as being blonde and with short hair.
The man said "hold on a sec" and he went back in. He came back with a younger blonde lady and says "is this her?" and Jeff says "No, that's not her."
The man then said "Well sir, there are three ladies that work in this office and this is the only blonde."
So then the man thought Jeff was lying. Jeff apologized and said "Sir, I'm going to be honest.. our visas aren't even supposed to be ready until Monday but our flight leaves on Saturday and we couldn't get anything switched and I was just wondering if anything could be done."
The man was like "No, there is nothing."
Jeff and the man (Chester) then had a brief conversation about how Jeff should go about getting the passports returned to them since we would have to reapply for visas in May. 
The man was like "Well, let me see your receipt" 
Jeff handed him the receipt that had all the visas listed and the man's response was
"Oh! seven!? You have SEVEN visas?? I don't even know how you got THIS far because the 3 day policy is only good for 2 visas or less. It should have taken you 9 business days to have these processed."
After a little talking Chester says "well.. here.. are you going to be in Chicago for a few hours?"
Jeff-"we can be."
Chester-"ok, well, the lady who does these comes back at 3 and so I'll try this one last thing for you and i'll call you in 45 minutes if it works out. If you don't hear from me.. it didn't work out... you know what.. how about I just call you regardless. I'll call you no matter what"

Jeff and Clint then found themselves in a Starbucks close by with Jeff's phone on the table between them. To add to the drama.. Jeff's phone battery is almost dead and they're watching it slowly drain. 45 minutes go by.. an hour.. and... *ring* 
"Jeff, this is Chester. Are you still in Chicago?"
"Yes we are"
"ok.. I have all seven passports ready to go."
*Jeff and Clint being super excited*
Chester-"Calm down! Calm Down! I'll be here until 5:30 and you can pick them up anytime"


After some time praying, Jeff and Clint went to pick up the visas. Chester had some last words for Jeff. "Sir, I do not know you. But, you guys must have really good souls because I have worked here for a long time and I have never in my life seen this happen. We have policies and we have them for a reason. Here are your visas, congratulations"


And that is what happens when people pray with the kinda faith that can move a mountain. Even if the mountain is in the form of the Brazilian consulate. 


My thanks to everyone who was praying for this trip. We are all very much aware that it was only through prayer that we got our visas in time and it was by the grace of God that we went to Brazil. 

Nothing Short of a Miracle

Matthew 19:26 

 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”


On Wednesday, my pastor who is leading the trip to Brazil woke up early and drove to Chicago at 4:30 in the morning to see if he could work things out at the consulate. He texted us telling us to pray for a miracle and so I spent half an hour in prayer that God would send us one. After a couple of hours of him talking to different people and trying to work things out in every possible way that he knew how he was told, "I'm sorry, sir. That is impossible. There is no way we can have your visas processed by your flights on Saturday but for sure we could get them to you by Monday." 


Our team met on Wednesday night to weigh our options. Monday would mean cutting the trip shorter and we might have to split the team up and take different flights. By the end of the meeting, it was looking like a Brazil trip in May was our best option. I left the meeting feeling slightly disappointed but in all honesty..I was okay with all of it. I love going home. I love being home. Not going to Brazil just meant I got to go home, not what i had anticipated, but not a bad alternative either. :) 


Anyways, we were encouraged to keep praying for a miracle because it would be a miracle that would take us to Brazil. We had until Friday to cancel our flights and so we were gonna remain optimistic and hold out for God to send us a miracle. 


Thursday (48 hours from scheduled flight) Jeff texted us to tell us that there were no flights for Monday and so we could look forward to a trip in may. We still had one day to cancel our Saturday flights and so we were going to wait for the last possible moment. 


Friday at 12:30 (28 hours from scheduled flight) Jeff and another Veritas staff member drove again to chicago.  The text read "He guys Clint and I are on our way to Chicago believing that perhaps if we walk into the Brazilian Consulate and ask for our visas (that aren't supposed to be processed until Monday) that God will make it happen. Pray for that. If it doesn't happen, we just know that God wants us in Brazil in May :) What a wild ride!" 


I felt this to be quite a step of faith and I wasn't sure what to think  would happen. I hadn't bothered to pack or prepare at all because there was a 90% chance I was spending my spring break at home in good ol' North West Iowa. 
The next few hours were filled waiting. My friend and I had already planned on leaving Iowa City at 5:30 to go home and I was looking forward to seeing my family again. 


4:08 pm (25 hours, 37 minutes from scheduled flight) Text from Jeff "Guys-we leave tomorrow. God is amazing!!! Pack and be at the veritas/salt offices by 10:30" 


AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PRAISE JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The next few hours were filled with packing and PTLing and just completely in awe of God. 


And that brings us to now. 8 hours, 25 minutes away from our first flight. My bags are packed, my room is clean and I am SO excited for this adventure!! 

Matthew 21:19-21 

Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, “May you never bear fruit again!” Immediately the tree withered.
  When the disciples saw this, they were amazed. “How did the fig tree wither so quickly?” they asked.
 Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done

Pardon me, but I think we're missing something..

"Pardon me, my lord,” Gideon replied, “but if the LORD is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all his wonders that our ancestors told us about when they said, ‘Did not the LORD bring us up out of Egypt?’ But now the LORD has abandoned us and given us into the hand of Midian.”

 ¹⁴ The LORD turned to him and said, “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?”

 ¹⁵ “Pardon me, my lord,” Gideon replied, “but how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.”

 ¹⁶ The LORD answered, “I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites, leaving none alive.”- Judges 6:13-16

I love this story! It makes me think about how often in my own life I catch myself thinking, "God did miracles back in the Bible times... but where is he now? And what is He even doing?" This is not to say that I don't trust God.. I do!! But more often than not it is easy to think that God has changed His way of doing things. This thought, of course, is absurd in the highest degree! GOD DOESN'T CHANGE! Even back in BIBLE TIMES people like Gideon were thinking that God was changing His way of doing things and had moved on from doing miracles. Not so much. God did quite a few different miracles before Gideon's eyes and Gideon worshiped God. 

Now, why is it that even though God speaks to us.. we ask Him to prove Himself?  The fact that I have joy in difficult situations.. that is totally evidence of God!  When things are hopelessly lost and we pray that God will show us where to look and we find them.. that's total evidence of God. When the sun rises or sets and casts epic wonderful colors all across the sky... that's total evidence of God. And the list goes on. God does things before our very eyes and we are amazed... until we forget about it. And then we sit there and ask God where He is and why He's not doing anything.  

You know, we are all constantly asking God, "where were you when..?" "Why weren't you there when...?" "Why did you let... happen?"

I have come to wonder if God is asking us the same questions like, "why weren't you looking when I healed that sick person?" "Where were when..?" "Why weren't you there when..?" Like.. where is your heart? If your heart is far from God... then how are you supposed to know when God is doing stuff. Where was your heart when God reached down and stopped that car from smashing into yours? Where was your heart when God reached out and kept your foot from slipping? Where was your heart when God painted you an epic sunset? Where was your heart when God caused the weather to be warmer than is considered normal for winter? Why weren't you thankful when...?

Yes.. it would be so easy to guilt ourselves into thinking about how much we've failed at noticing God or realizing His presence. But so often we are overshadowed by discouragement and we just honestly can't seem to see God no matter how hard we look for Him. God is not disappointed in you for this. God does not hold you guilty for this. What He really wants you to know about that is that He still really loves you a lot. When you can't see Him.. He sees you and He is SO proud of you! He is just crazy in love with you and wants to spend every moment with you! 

if the LORD had not been on our side
   when people attacked us, 

 they would have swallowed us alive
   when their anger flared against us;
 the flood would have engulfed us,
   the torrent would have swept over us,
 the raging waters
   would have swept us away -Psalm 124:2-5

God is always there for you, even in the storm..how else do you think you could have survived it?

So... if God is doing miracles and pulling us out of sticky situations and difficult times.. where is our faith? We pray as if God has better things to do with His time. Like "Dear God, uhmm.. it would be really nice if you let ____ happen." 

:/ I find myself doing this right now. Ya see.. my self and a couple 6 other people are planning on flying to Brazil on Saturday to spend a week serving at an orphanage in Fortaleza. In my heart I know that God can do ANY thing and nothing is impossible for Him. But, I'm looking at my worldly time span.. It's Tuesday.. that is 4 days from scheduled flight. The visas and passports are not yet in our hands.. WHAT AM I THINKING! God can do a LOT in 4 days! Heck.. God can do a lot in a couple of seconds! I think of the story in Matthew 14 where Peter was walking on water and all the sudden he chickened out. It says "Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” -Matt. 14:31

That is a good question, why do we doubt? Why do we have so little faith even after we've seen God do great things over and over and over? Because we are humans and we are ALWAYS under attack by our enemy. Christ tells us over and over and over to stand firm. To stay on our guard and to be aware that our battle is not against flesh and blood but "Against rulers, against authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms"-Eph. 612

So, when in doubt, trust Jesus. Sounds kinda silly.. but it's true. God knows exactly what He is doing all the time and we needs only to be still and Trust Him with our everything. AND! The bestest part is that we get to experience the joy of letting Him surprise us with His answer to our prayers. While His response may not always be the one we first imagined was the best thing we could get.. we always get an answer that turns out to be way better than our shallow minds could imagine. But while we wait.. we trust. And while we trust, we have joy. What is not in *our* hands are in God hands. Which is a good place for them to be.