Thursday, February 23, 2017

My life 2016Part 2: Without Pictures

For this second amazing re-cap of 2016 (Maybe I'll share pictures someday) I decided to post all of the draft clippings I never posted.. It'll be like reading my journals...which.. may not be all that exciting.

---June 8th 2016----
June is going to be out the door in just a second and I'm sure I'll miss most of it.  If I haven't mentioned it yet,  They put me through another round of training with another department and I'm slowly gaining skills and knowledge in every department on the floor. I don't mind it at all, in fact it makes me feel very important to be so well rounded and having people who've been here for years coming to me with their questions. 


It has been stressful in its own way, however, and it is exceedingly depressing to see my productivity numbers on the floor as I struggle to navigate the 6 new systems and 4 excel spreadsheets necessary to do this new line of work in which I am isolated from my co-workers and my interaction with my trainer is very minimal. My boss has informed me that once I am up-to-speed in this area he will have me begin training more of my own team. I appreciate their confidence in my ability to learn and teach, but I'm learning I tend to come down hard on myself for feeling inadequate for the position.

June 26: 

I figured I'd barely get a post in for June but I had no idea I'd be sliding it in at the very last minute.

A couple of my friends have gotten married which has made for road trips and full weekends and then more road trips for non-wedding related adventures.

Aye yi yi.. You might think I'm sitting down to write because things have slowed down and I have a moment, but nothing has slowed down and it shan't slow down any time soon. I'm mostly 'ok' with that. The most difficult thing is that it takes me away from my church family and community, but I've been working on fitting in more fellowship in the weekday evenings.


It's been good, though.

The Lord is good. I've been learning a lot about the need to be intentional with the Lord and pursue him with more than just "spare moments."

-----August 17th 2016-----

My blog seems to be a once-a-month edition lately. BUT! Hopefully that means every edition I type out is worth the read, right?

Everyone is saying it's the end of summer and school is starting and all of those things that would make me mourn the sunshine. But, honestly, This month is no different than April and I get to enjoy the sunshine the same amount. 

It's Iowa State Fair season, as well. I never went to the fair growing up but I don't think that's a bad thing as I doubt I would have known how to appreciate it fully. Plus, my childhood was so full of all its own exciting things, I would have just burnt out my joy of the fair on being hot, tired, and cranky. 

Anyways, I digress. July was full, guys. I drove home a lot, I traveled to Wisconsin and spent a wonderful week in the Word with my family, I hiked, I swam, I sailed, I worked. 

I still have my weekends filled with many things to look forward to, but I tell you what, they don't tell you about the part of adulthood where you wake up alone, go to work, come home to your empty house, make yourself dinner (Or just graze on grapes and crackers), wash dishes, do laundry, go to bed,  and repeat. 

Granted, some people out there are thinking, "That sounds amazing! To just have your own self to worry about and you just do what ever you want. " I mean, I'm thankful for the season. I'm thankful that when I need to do laundry, I do the laundry. When I need to do dishes, I do dishes. I'm aware of it being a blessing just in itself. I'm just saying, for an extrovert, it's an empty sort of existence. Or maybe not empty... lonely would be more accurate. 

And I COULD be entertaining people and having them fill my living room and partying with me late into the nights. But, actually, life is exhausting and I like to be in bed by 10pm. And then I protect the precious 5 hours of life that I live between getting off work and going to bed. 5 hours, guys. That's a small window to make responsible decisions. :/

But God is good. God is SO good. I use one night for Bible study, one night for discipleship. And I have two free nights for fellowship and one free night for laundry.


------09/22/2016-----When I started this blog I wanted it to be mostly deep thoughtsy and nothing too personal... not too much of ME but more of what God is doing in me. 

However, today is a spew blog... One where I just type out all my thoughts like a diary and you can grab some popcorn and read up on all of the gory details. 

I'm stressed. I hadn't realized it until yesterday.. or the day before.. But I'm coming toward panic mode. (trying to breathe). 

Here's about my life: 

Coming this Friday. I'm ABOUT to sleep in my bed 6 consecutive nights in a row for the first time in over a month. Before that it was several months. I usually manage 5 nights in my usual bed and then a few somewhere else, some other town, some other state. I still travel. I thought it was just a summer thing... it's not. It might be pretty consistent for who-knows-how long. 

It's usually only 2-3hrs drive to wherever my weekend adventure is, so it's pretty easy peasy. ALTHOUGH, I've met people who drive 2 hours and are done traveling for months (They don't even have kids). 

**Diclaimer** Traveling is not the stress in my life. Traveling, leaving, being with humans is the calm in my life. 
---

In a few short months.. like two, people will remember to be thankful again (up until thanksgiving is over) and so let me just get a little head start and say I'm REALLY thankful to be one of ten children. 
I'm thankful that all ten of us are bestest best friends. I'm thankful that the to sweet humans marrying in to our family next month are just two more best friends to add to the basket and it's a beautiful good thing to get together and talk about the Lord and our lives, and being the most ourselves we ever could be. 

Here's the hard thing: When God gives you a dozen best friend siblings and then scatters the basket all over the place. (It's actually beautiful too cuz vacation spots are everywhere). 

I do a lot of traveling to see my sweet friemly. Is that a word? Friend-family.. I'm making it a word. Friemly.


----October 6 2016----
Guys, I have drafted a million more updates and thoughts and THINGS going on in my life a million times over and I just.. I struggle. You wanna know where I'm at? I think I'm somewhere between the eye of hurricane Matthew and the tornado that took Dorothy and Toto to Oz and maybe a silly silo as well.  Life slows down for no one. 

First of all, I've been at good ol' MetLife for almost a full year now. (Next week is the anniversary). A full year!! Guys, I haven't done one thing for a whole consistent year since 2007. Which is almost 10 Years ago.

We made it through round one of the wedding craze and we're just heading into round two next week. Which is crazy to me. And also the most normal thing. The first wedding was a good practice round. I was in charge of the bird seed to throw at the send off for the Bride and Groom... I dropped that ball down a dark hole. So that's a bummer. BUT! They managed to get married and as far as I know.. nothing else was half so disastrous.



-----11/07/2016------I feel like it is cliché to keep on talking about how quickly is flown by this year. But it is November now, 2016 is wrapping itself up for Christmas and soon we'll all be regretting our holiday indulgences and resolving to work out more often and eat less sugar and maybe wash your sheets more frequently than you currently do. 

For all of the forgotten New Years resolutions I have every year, ( I still have not memorized all of Romans Chapter 8 :/) when I get to this part of the year, I am increasingly more thankful for everything a year entails. 

Januaries typically begin with the post-holiday depression and general complaint that it's too cold and can stop snowing and bring in Spring ASAP. February rolls in WAY TOO QUICKLY as my list of Valentines recipients grows longer and longer and hand-fashioning 30 some goofy poems and pictures seems to catch me off guard by Feb 11th when I'm staying up til 1am trying to finish all my projects. 

March never comes fast enough and stays way too long, giving teases of Spring and then dumping more snow on us when we're not expecting it. April and May seem to be like Spring stuck in slow motion and then June-August are usually out-of-control packed full of traveling, camping, hiking, road trips and adventure. September and October are usually filled with Fall things like apple orchards, pumpkins and corn mazes. This year, of course, it was more filled with wedding weekends, but I still managed THREE apple orchards and two corn mazes. 

And that brings us to now. Now when I glide for the two or three weeks before I get to go home to my family and smell the fire in the wood stove as I wake up in my sister's bed and we wander down stairs for coffee. We don't have any unique Thanksgiving-specific traditions. No one passes around a corn-cob and shares what they're thankful for or anything like that. But I think that's because any time home, whether in February, July or December, it is often discussed how thankful we are for each other and for our home and our friends.




11/26/2016:
It's the day after Thanksgiving and for the first time in my 25 years of life, I'm not with a single member of my family. I'm on lunch break from work where I have been sitting at my desk on hold for long amounts of time. 

I was able to be home for Thanksgiving Day and I hugged everyone goodbye last night, assuring them I'd be back in as close to 24 hours as possible. Which, that was actually really depressing because, in my family, we can do a lot of things with 24 hours. A lot of laughing, a lot of hugging and cuddling and coffee and games and stories and tea. Pots and pots and pots of tea, which, we drink out of tea cups with saucers. (We hold to our European heritage like we lived in Buckingham Palace). 

While listening to Christmas music on my drive back to Des Moines last night, I contemplated how many people hate Christmas music before it even starts because it's "Over-played." but I realized that I have the very fondest memories surrounding Christmas and all of the songs bring the warmest memories. 

--------


AND then Christmas happened. Which was beautiful all in and of itself. And new years and then came 2017. There's lots to tell and you'll probably find things out if you stay tuned... I might just revive this blog yet!

---

Upcoming Blog works: 

Where's Waldo and Where Does the Red Fern Grow are being blended together in an epic tale of "What's Fern's Life" .. to be completed eventually.

Rumor Has it :: A full detailed explanation on confusing and misleading pictures featured on facebook of Fern and some guy.. This blog answers those subtle questions like "Are there sparks?" 


Will Fern Ever Spend three consecutive weekends in the same city or small town? This blog will feature the ever mind-consuming question of it's truly possible for Fern to put down roots.

------ All this and more to come in the near or distant future that is completely unknown at this point in time-----


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

2016 Recap Pt 1



God Bless this poor blog. And my wonderful readers who may or may not still be out there. 

I didn't get around to a Christmas Card this year, but I'm decided to type up a YEAR IN REVIEW blog, which will hopefully explain a lot of my absence,


-------------------------

January 2016




January started itself back at home and all was right in the world. 
Mom and Dad's old farm house had some typical winter mouse issues which, of course, led to a very dignified mouse hunt by my siblings. 














Middle of January was especially cold and my sisters decided to come take advantage of my outdoor hot tub when it was a balmy 2F degrees outside. Our hair frosted and our eye lashes froze, but the memory is one of my very favorites. 





Martin Luther King Jr. Day Weekend brought a good many of us siblings back home to my mother and father's farm where we all hid from the freezing, snowy wonderland outside and spent an entire weekend sipping tea, listening to sound tracks, and having wonderful couch hang outs.






 As January wrapped itself up, February,  I found myself on a cold and snowy sort of adventure when I told a good friend of mine about an abandoned house I'd discovered on accident one-time. We drove around on the backest of back roads going off just my memories from getting lost in the summer one time when I exited too soon and couldn't get back on the interstate on account of construction.
Eventually we pulled out google maps and I guessed at a road it might be, and when we were just about ready to give it up, we crested a hill and there it was. Abandoned and rotting as ever. FORTUNATELY, everything was frozen as well.. hopefully that made the floors more solid. 


 I dearly love to guess as what made the house abandoned in the first place. For this sweet old thing, I think a fire took the kitchen. But it was beautiful to be sure
Valentines has been affectionately recognized with serious importance by all my siblings and any friends we've snowballed into the affair along the  way. Since it's one of those holidays that social media smears in your face if you don't have a significant other, we've taken to writing eachother ridiculous slam poetry. And By slam I mean, "Your heart is gem but not quite gold, more like a diamond because it's hard and cold." It's seriously a good time. I encourage all to take part in the day. 







In March I went to Nicaragua and tried my hand as a dental surgical assistant. People ask me if growing up on a farm helps me to be tough and not squeemish. I USED to be the toughest and not squieemest ever. BUT get sticky blood all over your hands while butchering on a hot summers day one too many times and your gag reflex is shot to pieces. While I did have to sit down a few times and swallow back all of my dinner on several occassions, God taught me about going where I was needed verses where I felt I would be most helpful. 
In April my position as TEMP at Metlife transitioned to my full time position as a new business rep. I worked a couple weeks on a FINRA project and then switched into working the licensing side of our dear sweet whole-salers. During this time, I had the opportunity to spend my days listening to Audiobooks while I processed away in my cubicle. I got through:
-Gone with the wind

-All of the Chronicles of Narnia Series
-The Great Divorce
-The Screwtape Letters
-Pride and Prejudice
-(Lots of Starwars)
-Adventures in Odyssey
-And many other WONDERFUL things you can adventure to by just listening. (Youtube, guys, check it out)


I also got in some real life books and remembered all of my dreams from college when all I wanted was for evenings at home with a cup of tea and a good book.
Sometimes dreams do come true. 




In May, Spring really sprung!
 While on a walk one day, my siblings and I decided there was a path we'd never traveled an abandoned plot of land we never explored and thus we did. We came up this natural wonder in a junk pile and found it to be AMAZING. 
I also ventured out on a hike with my sweet sister and at some point I realized I wanted a picture as I would someday be sitting in the cold wishing for Spring again. Here I am, this picture gives me hope for spring. 
June came and with it, came my best friend, Amanda's wedding. It was very exhausting and emotional and good. 
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And my life changed drastically in the hours after these pictures were captured and life has been a wirl-wind ever since. I will blog the rest of 2016 ASAP, But I thought I aughta publish SOMETHING before 2017 closes as well.