I like Des Moines. That might be hard to believe, considering I spend more time in my car than I do in my apartment, but I do.
But I travel. Ever since I moved I've been back and forth between Storm Lake and Des Moines, Iowa City and Des Moines and Minnesota and Des Moines. It's a good central location to everywhere I go in my life.
I got back to Des Moines today after 4 days away, and I shall be traveling to MN this weekend. Gracious. How is my life? Busy. It's busy and full and I'm ready to settle down. But, there will be no settling any time soon. Bless.
I won't complain. I like to be on the move. I shall feel a little spread out.
Actually, since moving, I've quite come to wonder who I am any more. I think I lost my full grip on my identity months ago. I don't know me any more. When you move somewhere new you have the chance to re-write your identity, all brand new, however you want. And I don't know who I am any more, so settling down here has been a challenge.
I became a "hick", I guess, while I was away. I began wearing boots and jeans with holes in them and hoodie sweatshirts and baseball caps. (I NEVER would have done that before). But it was what was practical for hauling fence, wrangling cows and chopping wood.
During some of my down time working in the office I browsed Pinterest for ideas on how to have healthier hair. I mean.. my hair grows really slowly.. I bleached it blonde in December of 2012 and the ends of my hair are still bleached... that's how slowly my hair grows.
So anyways.. .I decided I would become a hippie and see how all that life would be. The all natural, just eat some plants, don't wash your hair, brush your teeth with baking soda, sleep in the woods in a hammock even when you know it's going to rain and preach coconut oil like it was the end times. I felt more unaware of who I was when I was on that kick.. so I decided I'm not actually a hippie. I broke after two weeks and started washing my hair with shampoo again. (I still showered everyday.. just to clarify).
I also stopped with the jeans and hoodies and boots. I'm not a hick either. Currently, I'm a water-bottle toting, tshirt wearing gym junkie. But not that junkie.. I don't go out of my way to hit the gym.. just as often as possible.. so everyday or every other day. But I don't know that I'm actually a gym rat either.
Because my lifestyle doesn't really allow for that anyways. I'm on the road every couple days and I don't work out on vacation.. although I do seek out hiking trails and will hit multiples in a day if I can.
But that's weird. When did I become weird? When I became lost I guess. But I don't know when that was. I think, though, I'm trying so hard to analyze myself into a box so I can then try to find where I belong, but I'm so many odd different things I need to plug myself in so I have an identity again.
I need roots.
I need to grow some connections and branches and fruits of the spirit is whats what.
But, that is basically where I am for now. Not really anywhere. All over the place and hunting for a job. HOPING for a job. Wishing for a job. That's about it.
But, that is basically where I am for now. Not really anywhere. All over the place and hunting for a job. HOPING for a job. Wishing for a job. That's about it.
